A splash of something splattered onto the floor near the bathroom sink. When I looked up, I noticed a puffy line-like thing in the ceiling right above the splatter, but it looked dry. “Hey, Nate!” I said. “Can I borrow you for a moment?” When Nate made his way up the stairs, I pointed to… Continue reading Take a Dip
Tag: humor
Rainy To-Do List
The sky has emptied so many rounds of rain I’m surprised I can’t just launch myself downstream from my doorstep, aboard a trashcan lid. “Bon voyage!” I’d shout as I’d steer toward the neighborhood Safeway. And I’d come back with bits of chocolate and stories of confused river otters, who have just seen feral cats… Continue reading Rainy To-Do List
Yes, Cheese! Pão de Queijo
Before the Sandman could whack me over the head with flood-sized bags of sleep sand, I heard Alex come through the door after a day on campus. Ever since he was a child, he’s been fascinated with maps and exploring new places, so I wasn’t surprised that after his classes and prepping for tests, he… Continue reading Yes, Cheese! Pão de Queijo
“Hot Girl” Summer Dresses Come in a 3-Pack
Hold my wine spritzer. “Hot girl summer”[1] will rage again, and I’m prepared with not one, but three dresses that roam together as a 3-pack on Amazon. And they’re a bargain. They’re not really sultry or anything. They’re just basic sheaths with short sleeves, made of breathable (cotton?) fabric. And, they’re kind of thin, so… Continue reading “Hot Girl” Summer Dresses Come in a 3-Pack
Growing Peeps in the Bathtub
Our bathtub is a little fuzzier and more festive these days. So it’s with great joy—and a profound sense of “ick”— that I announce this big news: a couple of Peeps have hatched from hard plastic eggshells, and they’re marinating in water until they get bigger. When I rounded the corner at the local Safeway… Continue reading Growing Peeps in the Bathtub
Oh, Shoot! The Zombies Win
Sometimes, I let the zombies win. Sometimes, I don’t. But when I off a zombie in one of my horror stories, it just kind of falls off the edge of a cliff or something and dies, which is not really how you get rid of a zombie. But how do you get rid of one… Continue reading Oh, Shoot! The Zombies Win
Get with the Program: Theater Program Decor
A “Rock-A-Hula” sign, posted in the Royal Hawaiian Center in Waikiki, felt like a neon beckoning of a once-in-a-lifetime-I-don’t-even-know-what-to-say-moment—and an opportunity I had missed. Nate and I passed it up for many reasons, though the signage boasted of a luau, drumming, dancing, fire, and tributes to Elvis and Michael Jackson. Unless you count the gyrations… Continue reading Get with the Program: Theater Program Decor
Hamming it Up
I’m not one to roll around in the ham aisle, trying to get its scent all over me, but if a ham dropped from the sky, I’d probably put it in a sandwich or something—and eat it. So, yeah. I like ham. I’m just not going to run off with the first one I see.… Continue reading Hamming it Up
March to the Beet of a Different Salad (Beet Poke Bowl)
A slasher film looked like it took place in my kitchen last weekend, due to the “beeting” it received. Red beet juice covered the counters, my hands, and the chopping boards, but it was all worth it. A few weeks ago, when Nate and I visited Waikiki, we stopped by this place that served “beet… Continue reading March to the Beet of a Different Salad (Beet Poke Bowl)
Hair-Raising Curls: Getting Back to My Roots
Bed head with a side of plastered hair “swooshes” ambush me any time I leave the house in rain or humid weather. So straightening my hair in Hawaii was an effort as useless as understanding the user’s manual for a hardwired smoke detector installed in a previously owned house. The alarm keeps going off (your… Continue reading Hair-Raising Curls: Getting Back to My Roots
Fixin' Leaks and Leeks 