Plants on the Move!

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The plants have picked themselves up and moved into our bedroom because it’s too cold outside. Also, they’re probably possessed, which makes sense. The bedroom is the first place possessed things seem to want to go. Then, they wreak havoc all over the rest of the house, shaking their angry petals everywhere, knocking plates from cabinets, screaming obscenities, and vomiting green stuff. We’ve seen the movies. We know how it goes. There’s no escape.

So far, though, they only make me want to sneeze—but I kind of like them, with their menacing fronds creeping in the moonlight, so they can stay. They also offer a fresh aroma to the room, like recently cut grass.

All sweet-screams-possession-jokes aside though, Nate was actually the one who moved them in. They looked heavy, so I’m glad Nate did all the lifting. Since they won’t all fit on the bench I bought for them, one is kind of hanging off to the side, like it’s ready for mischief. (After all, it is a monstera plant, I believe, which is a fitting name in this case.) I wonder what it’s planning. Probably a takeover of Nate’s desk during a videoconferencing call. It’s eyeing his can of Coke for sure. Hope it doesn’t vomit green stuff during a budget meeting.

In any case, Nate is skeptical that they will live for very long in our bedroom, but I hope they do, and I have faith that Nate will keep those little devils going.

In other scary news: I have a new book out! It’s my second collection of horror-themed short stories, and I’m absolutely grateful to the extremely talented Suzanne Craig-Whytock, EIC and Publisher of DarkWinter Press. She has a hilarious blog, too, which you should follow. And, the cover is by John Skewes, an incredibly talented artist. Here’s where you can buy my collection: Twenty-Four-Hour Shift: Dark Tales from on and off the Clock.

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Your Turn: Do you have houseplants that you care for indoors during colder seasons?

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Published by ckennedy

Author of the DIY blog: Fixin' Leaks and Leeks. Paper/Rock Writing Consultation, Sole Proprietor.

23 thoughts on “Plants on the Move!”

  2. Congratulations on your book! I love reading about your plants and their antics. We do bring a few plants in during winter but it’s never going to be the same after this post of yours!

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  5. Hilarious post. 🙂 Congratulations on the new book! I am going on holidays in November and will have a copy along.

    My plants stay outside as I don’t trust them at all. I hate cleaning up green vomit at the best of times and really detest it when they follow me around like some wannabe triffid. Ugh.

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