Fixin' Leaks and Leeks

The cauldron at the Fixin’ Leaks and Leeks Headquarters is running dangerously low on leaf-shaped candy—and whiskey.

Typically, I fill the cauldron (little glass bowls) with a candy corn pumpkin mix that I kind of don’t really hate. It satisfies my need for sugar and quaint autumn décor. I don’t LOVE it. But I do HAVE to have it.

And then, I found these leaf-shaped candies by Brach’s, and I thought, “Here’s something I might also not hate, but now it’s leaf-shaped, and in fall colors, which is different!”

I bought a couple of tiny bags, thinking they would last all of October, and then…be still my dark, autumnal heart…I LOVED them. They tasted like all kinds of pumpkin-spiced, butter-rum, apple-pie loveliness, dancing through a Hansel and Gretel forest right toward the witchy oven of my stomach.

Nate and Alex went bonkers for them, too, which really confirmed for me that these treats were just the bat’s knees for sure.

Then, Nate went online and noticed that there were “mixed reviews.” Some people said they tasted like candles with a little bit of sweetness. To be honest, I love candles. And if candles taste like these leaf-shaped goodies, then watch out, Yankee Candles Company. I’m coming to dinner!

Now, here’s the dilemma: With what do you wash down a leaf-shaped candy? Well, I’m a sucker for a gimmick, and the other day, at Safeway, I saw a sign: “Adult Trick-or-Treat.” And there, beneath the sign, were bags of little cinnamon whiskey bottles that you could hand out, discreetly, to adults on trick-or-treat night.

I’m not planning on handing these out for many reasons. For instance, the entire bag smells like a gas station. I almost didn’t even try a swig, but I twisted the cap off of one of the bottles, poured the liquid over ice, and was absolutely amazed. The resulting beverage tasted like one of those candy cinnamon discs from childhood. Not bad at all.

Sadly, we’re almost out of the leaf-shaped candy. The mini-whiskey bottles, on the other hand, will probably last until next Halloween. We’re not going through those any time fast, but I’ve noticed that the candy leaves at the local supermarket have been pushed to the back of the shelf, behind all the other candy, so that leads me to believe that the people stocking this stuff are hiding it. And I don’t blame them at all. I’d do the same thing.

I’d totally hide this leaf-shaped candy in a thick forest, filled with bats and flesh-eating mallow creams.

Your Turn: What’s a treat you’ve been craving lately?