This photo shows a beige bowl, set on a marble-ish countertop. Inside the bowl, there is oatmeal, sprinkled with brown sugar.

How Much Oatmeal Can You Bench?

This photo shows a beige bowl, set on a marble-ish countertop. Inside the bowl, there is oatmeal, sprinkled with brown sugar.

Release the weightlifting belt from the trunk of the car. Oatmeal has arrived, and it’s swole. Protein-packed oatmeal that promises strength and a delightful chocolate chip cookie recipe found its way into the Fixin’ Leaks and Leeks kitchen, and I mistakenly believed there was actual chocolate in the oatmeal. The chocolate chip recipe on the back of the box had nothing to do with any kind of chocolate IN the oatmeal, but I fused those two ideas in my head, and I couldn’t get them unstuck, so I made myself some Kodiak oats oatmeal—and quickly discovered—it needed something. Perhaps, it was chocolate. Definitely not salt. The preparation method called for a pinch of salt. I used less than a pinch, but I only tasted salt. And oats. So I tore apart the pantry, found the brown sugar, and mixed it in—and everything was right with the world.

I remember eating oatmeal as a child. My parents viewed it as a hearty, stick-to-the-ribs meal before school, and I remembered it as such—but this version really does stick to the ribs. I could feel it attaching to each part of my insides. In fact, I couldn’t finish the bowl. Nate had to finish it for me.

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoyed my Kodiak oats with brown sugar, but they really are quite filling, which I think is the point. They sprinkle protein powder between each oat, which means that if I ever take up weightlifting, I won’t need to take a swig of protein powder shakes in between each squat. All the power I’d need would already be inside me, which would make for a great campaign slogan for oatmeal: “All the power you need has been inside all this time. Unleash it, bowl by bowl, you magnificent beast.”

Your Turn: How do you start your day?

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Published by ckennedy

Author of the DIY blog: Fixin' Leaks and Leeks. Paper/Rock Writing Consultation, Sole Proprietor.

24 thoughts on “How Much Oatmeal Can You Bench?”

  4. I’ve now stopped eating breakfast. I drink a cup of black coffee. For lunch I have leftover meat and for dinner it’s usually a steak.
    When I was younger and until maybe five years ago I regularly made porridge in the mornings and added a little brown sugar or for a treat maybe some golden syrup or condensed milk.

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  5. I used to regularly eat porridge for breakfast but I’m now only supposed to eat it sparingly because of a medical condition. I’m really not much of a breakfast eater, though (I only ate it because it was “good for me”) and naturally prefer to go without.

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  8. I really should try some oatmeal in the mornings! I usually start my days with scrambled eggs and a bit of cream cheese, and a cup of coffee, sometimes with a splash of milk. We usually have oatmeal at home, so I guess that’s my project for the week! Hope you’re doing well!

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  9. Wow. I might be sold on that oatmeal–while adding brown sugar. I generally have coffee for breakfast. Okay, so if this is a healthy food, having a cookie recipe on the back is kind of weird and confusing.

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    1. I guess it’s not really that healthy. Nate made the chocolate chip cookies recipe, and when he compared the nutritional information, it’s the same as a regular chocolate chip cookie. (lol)

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      1. So is the chocolate chip cookie recipe really for an oatmeal chocolate chip cookie? How are the oats and the cookie related? Distant cousin twice removed on his mother’s side?

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  11. Oatmeal is good, though I always make it savory rather than sweet. I cook it in chicken stock and flavor with a bit of chicken stock powder and….sorry….salt. 😁 Then I add a soft-boiled egg on top. Talk about sticking to the ribs!

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