Sometimes, the candy cane is the kid in the pageant who sings a little too loudly, does a body roll, followed by some serious arm-windmill action that knocks the wind out of the piano accompanist, who is clearly not getting paid enough to work the show. Then, that candy cane falls off the stage, landing in some kind of mess that well-meaning pageant organizers have somehow overlooked.
That’s kind of what happened when I decided I’d swap out crushed candy canes for chocolate chip cookie dough batter. What could go wrong? Just ask Minty, the Candy Cane, Who Briefly Fell on the Ground. He’s the star of a Conan O’ Brien skit that I love, and that sadly, ended several years ago. No, the candy cane in my recipe did not have the disgusting, but lovable adventures that Minty had, but it did kind of stick to the baking sheet.
The resulting cookie was somewhat chewy, buttery, crunchy, and kind of awkward, but in a way that brightens up a third-grade Christmas pageant that has just finished all twelve days of the “Twelve Days of Christmas” in 52 different languages—all of them off key and offensively pronounced.
So, how do you make candy cane cookies? Just follow your favorite chocolate chip cookie recipe, such as the one detailed in one of my past blog posts, here. Then, whack the sense out of a box of regular-sized Spangler candy canes. I like to use a rolling pin. Sometimes, to be festive, I use a stocking stuffed with holiday-shaped rocks, which I later paint and hide in the neighborhood for the children to find.
In terms of peppermint taste: I would use peppermint schnapps instead of vanilla for the flavoring, but Nate wanted me to reserve some of the batter for chocolate chip cookies later on, so I refrained from saucing up the dough.
Results: I have no regrets. I’d do it again. The candy cane in the pageant is a likable disaster. Very entertaining.
Your Turn: Did you ever have to perform in an all-school performance as a child for special occasions? Did anything funny happen? Did you, or another classmate, do anything unexpected? Discuss!