This photo shows a hummingbird mid flight, hovering over some red crocosmia flowers. In the background, there are banana plants.

Nervous Beakdown: Identifying Birds in the Yard

This photo shows a hummingbird mid flight, hovering over some red crocosmia flowers. In the background, there are banana plants.

Dive-bombing birds are ruining my productivity. They’re flitting about with their feathery tail feathers, buzzing past my ears, and just looking so darn cute, I can’t stand it. How am I supposed to get any reading done in the backyard? And there is so much hot-girl summer reading to do.

So, I’ve decided to take up amateur birdwatching, and I’ve identified the following:

  • Hummingbirds—there’s a group of about 4-6 very brave hummingbirds that chase after each other and get dangerously close to me, Nate, and Alex—like they don’t care that we’re bigger than they are, that we have strong, menacing opposable thumbs, strengthened by hours of texting and turning book pages. Fun fact: a group of hummingbirds is called a charm! They love our red crocosmia flowers. And I just want to squeeze and hug them tight.
  • One very mouthy crow that sits on the neighbor’s roof and makes a lot of noise. We keep showing it shiny things, but that just encourages more noise. They say crows have favorites. Maybe we’re a favorite? Maybe it likes the tropical trees and plants Nate put in the yard? Or, it’s just angry. Angry that I’m reading horror stories about murderous monsters, instead of crows, which are just feathery small monsters with a very determined attitude.
  • One robin—very plain with a hint of red on the belly. It likes to sit on the fence and look directly at us, which is a little unnerving. Once, I think I saw a worm in its beak. It probably won’t rest until every single worm in the backyard is safely in its beak—and I swear it turns its head as it leaves to watch and make sure we don’t chase after its precious worm. We’re not interested. Unless it’s a tropical-flavored gummy worm, clinging desperately to the side of a piña colada glass—like many of us are doing these days.
  • A dark-eyed junco—which kind of hops around on the ledge of the fence—as if the wooden boards were made of hot lava. But it doesn’t want to fly, and it doesn’t want to end up in our yard. So, it hop-flutters confusedly. Ironically, according to some random internet sources, the junco can symbolize “balance” and also “stability.” Maybe it just got a hold of that piña colada gummy worm I’ve been hiding—especially from the crow.

Other critters who’ve curtailed my reading attempts in the yard: sparkly dragonflies, moths, butterflies, and a very cautious bunny who nibbles on the grass. I’m thinking about feeding it papaya treats, so it will be my best bunny friend forever (bbff). Together, we’ll snuggle in a nest of books with our own secret piña colada-laced gummy worm stash and high-falutin’ reading goals.

In other news: I’ve supplied another very important contribution to The Daily Drunk: “Trainwreck: Poop Cruise & Red Biohazard Bag Cocktail Review”

Your Turn: What’s your favorite animal to spot in the wild?

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Published by ckennedy

Author of the DIY blog: Fixin' Leaks and Leeks. Paper/Rock Writing Consultation, Sole Proprietor.

29 thoughts on “Nervous Beakdown: Identifying Birds in the Yard”

  4. At the beach I visit every weekend my favourite animals to see are dolphins frolicking near where I walk. If they are not there, then I delight in seeing a pelican or two.

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  5. I get distracted by birds through my window. Hummingbirds, check. A couple crows, check. Yellow tanagers, extra distracting, check. Sadly, no gummy worms here. I want a bunny. bbff is totally something I would’ve written. But this line was my fave: “clinging desperately to the side of a piña colada glass—like many of us are doing these days.” Love it. 🙂

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  10. Where we live – north of you – we have cougars [the animal kind – not the over dressed female kind with short skirts and large sunglasses who are always going after men 40 y + years younger than them – though I think I’ve seen a few of that kind every so often at Haggen in Lake Stevens] – and apparently mountain lions – and a few years ago – there were bear sightings across the road from us. Though I had no intention of going across the road to see if there Really was a bear there.

    And we get lots of deer out here. Last year a Law Enforcement officer was shot and killed by a drug addict because he was guiding a deer across the road so it would not be hit [by either aforementioned drug addict or any of the other drivers on the road]. The druggie killed him in front of his family – very sad situation.

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    1. Sounds like you have a lot of animal sightings where you live! Our neighborhood, in general, has had a few bear sightings + a bobcat that likes to walk around every once in a while.

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