Escaping unnecessarily invasive space aliens was high on my list of goals for 2018 and I’m happy to report that I prevailed. Whew! Here’s to prudent goal setting! Cheers! However, I know that I must up my game because “playing it safe” is kind of boring. Every year I put the same thing on my… Continue reading Upping the Goal-Setting Game for 2019: I Will Dance in a Parade!

The butter situation in the state of Washington is out of control and I’m losing my Betty Crocker mind. “You must face your dairy demons alone,” Betty says in a dream-like haze. “This is how you learn.” And this is what I’ve learned: If I use a cup of butter made or packaged here in… Continue reading Butter Bumbles and Cookie Crumbles

When rum balls and gingerbread are bursting at the delicate seams of your holiday guests’ insides, a touching “Hallmark-style” recitation is just the tonic they need. I know this for sure because recently, after starchy meals, I’ve just started watching the Christmas specials on the Hallmark Channel and I’ve been pleasantly surprised. This season, when… Continue reading Create a Hallmark Special Christmas Story to Recite at Parties

“Interviewing” trees at the local U-cut farm is a grueling process because, in order to be the crowning gem of a memorable holiday hoopla in our house, the tree must have sticky-out branches with the ability to unravel ugly sweaters, goose the cat, and make mischievous, merry, and bright well past the new year. Being… Continue reading Mischievous, Merry, and Bright

High alerts went out on the neighborhood Facebook page when rumors spread that I was looking for cupcake holders—and I wouldn’t be using them the way they were intended to be used. Through the power of adhesive tape, an HGTV video, and sheer force, these cupcake holders would never be the same. They would be… Continue reading Craft Alert: Lock Up Your Cupcake Liners!

After knocking the cranberries out of my stuffing while trying to imitate the Rockettes in the Macy’s Parade, I decided to just calm down and put out some appetizers. “Already?” Nate asked. “I just got the turkey in the oven. It’s like 10 a.m. or something.” “It’s officially Thanksgiving when I’ve pulled my wishbone trying… Continue reading Serve the Cranberry Sauce First

A lack of fall themed napkins in my house has thrown me into such a tizzy that I’ve had to take drastic measures: I sounded a “craft alert,” which caused Nate and Alex to evacuate the house in search of “hair cuts.” When I came running down the stairs with a package of Sharpies and… Continue reading Craft Alert: Fall Dinner Napkins

Shoving the business end of a “neti pot” up the nose is an activity that cannot be taken lightly. Explicit ancient cave drawings, which I’ve somehow been able to create, with the help of my 16-year-old son, tell a cautionary tale. (See Figure 1 below.) Indeed, next to the furnace, the neti pot is the… Continue reading Neti Pot “No-Nos” and Marriage Tips

Burrito night just got topped off with a coffee cake in our house and Betty Crocker is appalled. She’s calling the police right now. She, and the Joy of Cooking, would probably suggest flan or fruit, reserving the coffee cake for brunch, but when my belly’s full of burritos, I’m not waiting around for brunch.… Continue reading Rebel Coffee Cake/Blogger Awards Nominations

Horror experiences, of the kind where gruesome-looking actors chase people through cornfields filled with “pop up” deranged farm animals, are professional development for me. I write horror stories in my spare time, but I’ve never been to one of those Halloween haunted house type deals because I’ve always chickened out. However, on Saturday, I participated… Continue reading A Possessed Barn/Horror Attraction: Survival and Professional Development