While dizzy and disoriented from all the holiday lights and spirited drinks that seem to pounce at me from every corner this time of year, I did something I knew I could have regretted: I watched mindless Youtube videos. However, I happily fell victim to this alluring Prancercise segment. In it, Joanna Rohrback, demonstrates steps she developed in the late 80s/early 90s. Her exercise program however, didn’t really take off until 2012 and it has caught on like wildfire. I myself was captivated. I just had to try it for myself and pass along these simple tips:
- Wear tight pants. My yoga pants may not be tight enough. Maybe that’s what’s holding me back from my true Prancercise potential. Luckily, I own a washing machine and I possess just the right skills to shrink any article of clothing without even trying. It’s my superpower.
- Perhaps invest in ankle weights. Joanna wears ankle weights. I did not. I didn’t have them on hand. Besides, I thought that they would hinder “prancing”—for me anyway. Not Joanna.
- Learn the four basic moves. I have no hope in mastering them, since I can’t distinguish between them. So, I just imagined what a horse would do “naturally” (floating movements, twirls, etc.)—and then I just did that. Or, I did what I would do at the office holiday party—something subtle and understated—like a horse.
- Prance like the wind.
Now, like I’ve mentioned before, I’m not up to Joanna’s level yet, but I had myself one heck of a prancy, dancy time. It actually did lift my spirits on a dull and drizzly Pacific Northwest day. How could I not Prancercise and smile?!! I even imagined myself—out in my neighborhood—impressing my neighbors with all of my smooth moves, but then I remembered an exchange from the neighborhood Facebook page that went something like this:
Neighbor 1: I’m just letting you all know that I’ve been doing a neighborhood watch this afternoon and there’s this guy right here (picture of a man) with a huge backpack, who is walking up to people’s doorsteps!
Neighbor 2: Good job! Call the police! He’s probably stealing packages.
Neighbor 1: Will do, but then, there’s this guy out walking his dog! (Picture of another man out walking his dog.) Is he really just walking his dog? Or is he stealing packages too?
Neighbor 2: No—he’s walking his dog. He lives here.
Neighbor 3: Yes, I know him. He lives here. Don’t call the police.
Neighbor 4: Hey—I’m in a minivan driving slowly around the neighborhood and looking at houses. Please don’t call the police. I’m just looking at the lights.
So, if I were to put on festive walking pants and Prancercise about, I’m sure the neighborhood Facebook page would blow up. No way. I’m keeping my Prancercising “underground” and close to home. I should probably stay away from open windows and doors, but I’m not promising anything. Chances are, someone in my neighborhood might see me Prancercising and become alarmed. So, I’m on it. I’m feverishly creating a decorative, but informative (and calming) sign that says: Yes, I Live Here. I Do Not Need Medical Attention. This is Normal Behavior for Me. I Let Myself Out to Prance Around My Living Room Between 3 p.m. and 5 p.m. on Tuesdays. Please Do Not Post Any Pictures of This Activity to Facebook. Do Not Call the Police or the Fire Department, Unless I Prance my Pants Off—Or They Happen to Catch on Fire From My Tight, Tight Moves.
Your Turn: Who or what keeps your spirits up during the holidays?