Fixin' Leaks and Leeks

The cat sprung a leak the other night—all over the floor outside of his litter box.  When I discovered the leak, the evidence was still warm and salmon-smelling.  I was thoroughly disgusted. . . until I saw the paw marks. Oh, the horror! SeaTac the cat was spreading the leak all over the house. “Get… Continue reading A Leaky Cat Leads to Leaks

At an undisclosed location under the sea, the members of the Spotted Prawn Association of Totally Yummy Cuisine (SPATYC), met and discussed ways in which they could be even more delicious than they already are. A brief transcript, secured by rather questionable means, has somehow miraculously been “found” and published for the first time on… Continue reading Shrimp and Tomato Pasta

If sailing on silken waves of vanilla and blackberries seems like a far-fetched dream, it’s not.  Simply stick a spoon into a 5.3-ounce cup of Chobani blackberry fat free Greek yogurt, and you’ll be aboard a luxury ship, cruising alongside delicious fluffy dolphins, full of live and active yogurt cultures.  I set sail on this… Continue reading The Power of Chobani Yogurt

Bowling, my birthday activity last year, was a thrilling, rockin’, star-of-the-show experience that I wasn’t sure I could effectively re-create this year, so I didn’t even try.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love throwing down five-pounders and watching those gutters scream in terror because of the sheer force with which my aim veers off course,… Continue reading Birthday Strategy for Years To Come: Comedy Improv

The extra sudsy super-sized swim-o-matic hot tub that shoots laser beams and disco glitter never arrived in 2019.  (Neighbors within at least a five-mile radius are probably grateful.) However, the brand-new garbage disposal, which I did get, is a very good consolation prize.  The garbage disposal that came with the house was stinky and gross. … Continue reading Hot Tub? What Hot Tub? –Goals for 2020

Magical gingerbread beings, with access to twinkling lights and horse-drawn carriages, must have built Victoria, Canada—and I couldn’t have been happier to just come running at its harbor, armed with expandable waist pants, a jug of eggnog, and an unrelenting hunger for super cute stuff.  That’s just how delicious this place looks and is. You’ll… Continue reading The Fixin’ Leaks and Leeks Team Visits Victoria

The best, most wonderful torque-filled, grinding piece of magic arrived in the mail the other day, and I couldn’t wait to attach it to my kitchen sink. “The garbage disposal is here!” I texted Nate, when it arrived. In fact, it was here on the same weekend that we were planning to kick up our… Continue reading Holiday Mash-Up: Garbage Disposal Installation and the Snowflake Lane Parade

The television set wigged out on me Saturday night, and as we all know, when that happens, the entire family expects a disco ball to fall from the kitchen ceiling, while double-decker fudge brownies, in the shape of elves, jump from the oven. These elves should be festooned with noisemakers, dance around, and throw up… Continue reading Elf Free, Gluten Free Pistachio-Cranberry White Chocolate Bark

Shimmy into some super stretchy exercise tights and strap a pair of antlers onto your head. It’s time for the Fixin’ Leaks and Leeks Holiday Themed Workout.  The moves are based on things you might actually do during the holiday season.  That way, you’ll be in the greatest of shape when you have to do… Continue reading Holiday Themed Workout: Fixin’ Leaks and Leeks Style

It may be missing its legs, and the Association of Advocates for Consumer Safety would ban it from all toy store aisles, but “Thanks-A-Lot,” the crazy stuffed turkey is an incredible feat of crafting that took me a nail-biting two hours to make.  But I pulled it off.  Barely.  As usual, I had grandiose plans… Continue reading Craft Alert: Make “Thanks-A-Lot,” the Stuffed Turkey